This post is not going to be about the meeting itself, that will come later. What I wanted to post about was what I learned about myself while I was there.
1. I really wish that I had somebody there with me who I could have bounced ideas off of. There’s something about having a room with two beds in it (and only using one) that really made me long for one of my Earlham friends to be there with me. That way at night after everything was over, we could have sat up and talked theology.
2. I really do like talking theology.
3. There’s a difference between being by yourself and being with yourself.
4. This feeling I’ve had about the whole seminary process is something everyone who’s gone to seminary goes through.
5. I really do love my friends. Even the ones who drive me batty.
At Common Meal today a group of 5 of us sat together at what we dubbed “the cynical table.” We’re at different levels of cynical-ness…….P. is at the most cynical I have ever seen him. E. is trying to hold on for 6 more weeks (she moves in early June). AM. is deciding whether she will stay in Richmond or try to transfer somewhere else. C. just wants the semester to be over so she can concentrate on the baby. And then there’s me…….who worries about them all and still wonders why the hell am I here.
I am especially worried about E. (mainly because I want to mother her) It hurts me to see how some things are affecting her. She is such a bright light that it………..I can’t even put it into words. So I’m trying to find a way to be present for her.
Back to the cynical table……..it was very nice to let off some steam with people who weren’t going to judge. There was much laughter at our table, in between talking about interpretive dance, romance novels/sex/relationships, food services and a few other things.
While I will always continue to wonder why I’m here, I can never doubt that God brought these people in my life for a reason. They are helping me become more me and step out of my comfort zone (as some of you know my comfort zone is being the shy fat girl in the corner). I will be forever grateful to them (and love them) for that.
This is not going to be a rant on the new UUA ad in TIME. While I have many problems with it, I won’t go into them now.
What I do want to riff on for a few lines is partly what Peacebang in her post on the new ad was getting at; why would we tell anybody to doubt their prayers, especially after telling them that in times of doubt prayer is a good thing to do?
Yes, I can tell that I’m now spending my time with Quakers. Because I truly believe that what the second line should have said was: When In Prayer, Listen.
Prayer is the time when one is supposed to be in contact with that which is beyond us. To tell people to doubt that contact is unproductive to say the least. But to not tell them to listen for the still, small voice of reason/care/concern is criminal.
There is more that I could write, but I guess I should get on with my Theology paper that due Thursday.
Celebrate with me. As of 7 minutes ago I uploaded one of my papers due this week. Yipeeeeeee!!!!!!!!
So that leaves the two bigs ones left to work on…….Theology and Church History. I’ll be working on the theology paper tomorrow, Tuesday and Wednesday. I’ll work on the church history paper Thursday and Friday. But knowing me, I’ll try to work on both of them at the same time a frustrate myself.
oh well….only a few more days to go ’til the end.
I’m too happy today. My train tickets were in the mail when I arrived back home from campus. What a wonderful surprise, as I wasn’t expecting to see them before I got back from District meeting next weekend. So this trip is really going to happen. I’m soooooooooooooo excited. Not even the work that I have to do this week can crush this excitement. Just 12 more days and I will be sitting on a train headed east to see people that I really want to see. And……I get to shop at Tiffany & Co. What more could this girl ask for? (well, there is stuff that I could ask for……it’s just not publishable 🙂 )
So I’m going to bask in the glow of my unexpected mail. And work on my verbatim later.
It has been a hilarious couple of days.
It’s easy to tell that we’re at the end of the semester…….we’ve all gone just a little crazy. Why do I say this? Because when an innocent comment about Denzel Washington and God becomes the mantra for a small but growing group of seminary students, you know that we have been talking theology too long. 🙂
Suffice it to say that Denzel plays a much bigger role in the visions that many of us have about God than most of us thought. And none of us are complaining.
It is a misunderstanding of what the Emancipation Proclamation did to say that it freed all the slaves. It did NOT. The 13th Amendment did that.
The Emancipation Proclamation freed slaves in Union-occupied territory. That’s all. Nothing more.
For my paper in Theology class I have decided to write about intimacy and ultimacy. So of course you know that James Luther Adams will be the star of the show.
I’m just wondering, however, if there are other people I should look at. I thought about Henri Nouwen, but don’t know how I would make him fit.
Any suggestions would be appreciated.
I’ve been reluctant to post since Sunday because I really am in a state of gratitude because of people in my life like E. and R. and I want to keep that gratitude up front.
But life moves on. I turned in my paper in New Testament on the Syrophoenician woman. I had to cut it some to make it just under 10 full pages, and that was a good feeling. It had been a while since I had written anything that long, and non-fiction at that. So maybe I’ll actually be ok here in seminary.
With that paper down, I have 2 other major papers plus a visit report to go. And one last presentation, in New Testament about the Gospel of Judas and how we got the canon we got. Thank goodness I’ve got most of the information I need for all that work.
I decided that tonight I wasn’t going to do any work and just relax. Back to work in the morning.
After class on Thursday, E. said something that I’m just now processing: “You fall in love first, and work stuff out as you go along.”
Does that apply to friends too? ‘cuz I’m in love with a few of my friends (and as you can see I’m not talking about romantic love). And it does seem as if we work stuff out as we go along. Plus, they tend to share a lot of stuff in common. So does that mean I have a “type” when it comes to friends?
Anyway……E. and I hung out for a couple of hours today. I felt so special……the “popular” girl in class actually spent time with me. With me! That never happens to me. Wait…..let me correct that……it happens anytime R. and I are together. I am always amazed that I am on her radar. Mainly because I stand in awe of her.
I always say a prayer to G-d in gratitude for the people like R. and E. who take time out of their very busy lives to spend time with little ‘ole me, who can’t offer them anything more than they already have. They have given me so much that I will never have enough words to tell them how much they mean to me and how my life would be totally different without them.
oh well….guess it’s time to get back to my NT paper.