The Sista Rules For UU Church Growth

I’ve been reading with interest the latest installment on the UU Growth blog about whether or not to post sermon titles. As I said in my last post, I am firmly in the “do not post” camp. But as I’ve read the discussion I’ve noticed something else…the black church has been doing it wrong for all these years 😉 ; they are not helping newcomers overcome the normal barriers to attending church by only publishing the times of Sunday School and Worship. Now them doing it wrong is one of the reasons that I will most likely end up back in the black church, but that’s not important right now.

UUs make growth complicated when it’s not. So I’ve come up with six rules for UU church growth. Do I expect anybody to pay attention? Not really…but I’ll tell them anyway.

Rule #1…Stop thinking that you are the only religious people who think. In street terms, stop acting like ya s*** don’t stink–you ain’t all dat.

Rule #2…Believe (or pretend you believe) you have a gospel that people might just want to hear. see rule #1.

Rule #3…Read the Book of Acts. It is THE story of church growth. see rule #1.

Rule#4…Act as if you believe you have a gospel that people might just want to hear. see rule #1.

Rule #5…Re-read the Book of Acts. see rule #1.

Rule #6…Do what the early church did in the Book of Acts. see rule #1.

There you have it. Six simple rules for growing UU churches. Now…I’m sure that some of you will be uncomfortable with reading the Book of Acts. Tough. Suck it up. I know you don’t believe that Jesus is the Messiah. That’s fine. That’s not why I’m telling you to read Acts. You read Acts to see how people act when they really believe they have something worth sharing. Novel concept, isn’t it?


5 thoughts on “The Sista Rules For UU Church Growth

  1. I’d say, if you are going to post sermon titles, post a summary of the sermon as well – like journals have a title and abstract.

    I agree with Rule 1 especially, but the other rules are good too. I just think we need to work out what our good news is – some people have addressed it in those terms, and concluded that it’s Beloved Community – but that’s not a “unique selling point”.

  2. In addition to Acts, I’ve recently realized that a fair amount of Paul’s letters can be read viewing Paul as church growth consultant – not so much theology, but “stop doing that thing I warned you against,” and here’s how you should do it.

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